Well I was getting divorced but that was not a great accomplishment. Now I was alone with five kids to raise alone. I mean alone. I would have gone back to New York, but with my parents gone it would not have helped. I had rented the house out for the income but it was a strain trying to keep it up. Besides I needed the money. So I sold it and held the mortgage. That bought in some income along with me working full-time at a lousy clerical job. He did pay child support. The minimum. eighty dollars a child. So that twenty a week was to pay for food, clothes, housing, medical and keep up the house.
I worked full-time so going to school was out. I was just keeping my head above water. And forget about dating. Who is going to date a women with five small children and no money to dress up and look half way decent.
Besides I didn’t go anywhere to meet anyone. No time, no money.
He took the kids once a month. He didn’t help with the house. Didn’t help with the kids soccer or dental or medical insurance and co-pays. Besides having to cook and clean and take care of all the kids needs. The holidays were the worst. No help.
I mean the holidays had always been hard for me. Without any family around I always tried to make it more festive. I bought a real big Christmas tree. I hung the lights on the house. I made a big dinner. I wrapped all the presents. The biggest stress was getting the presents and shopping. Also the money!!! My Aunt Anne always sent money, but she would wait till right before Christmas, so I had to wait to the last minute to go and buy presents. Trying to get everyone at least some stuff they wanted. I hated it. I was angry that I was left to do everything for the holidays. He never offered to help with the presents or with the tree or with extra money. He never took them on any of the holidays so it was up to me to try and make it as nice as possible.
Same went for Thanksgiving, Easter, Fourth of July and the big dread, buying school clothes!! Ever try to buy five kids clothes for starting a new year at school. He occasionally took them shopping. And bought them stuff they absolutely hated.