I started this blog basically as an outreach to others who have been lost in the chaos.
Back in the late 60’s early 70′ there was no terminology describing domestic violence. That wasn’t even a term. Not battered women-nothing except wife beating. Which wasn’t a very pleasant term for the victims.
Of course this has been going on since the beginning of time and pretty much was ignored. It was a family affair. “Don’t hang out your dirty laundry”. Learn to be quiet.
Police were instructed to just break it up. No one was arrested and victim were left to their shame. Church’s did not support a women. And my church the Catholic church was against divorce. I cant say I ever even thought of going to a priest.
There were no domestic violence shelters. My own mother told me to “learn to be quiet”. I was young, 18 with a baby. The baby was the son who was taken by a knife to his heart. I won’t even go into that.
So I stayed. I was thrown down stairs. I had my head held in the kitchen sink. He ripped off the towel rack in bathroom and threatened me. I was miserable and had no one to turn to.
My friend knew but she never said leave. I didn’t know about social services. We lived in the “country” farms etc in upstate New York. I did have a friend whose mother had her arm broken by her father. We thought nothing of it. “Oh there goes old lady ….going to the hospital” Crazy.
So I stayed. Ashamed and humiliated that “my husband” would hurt me. It must be me. My parents won’t help.My friend won’t help. So I will just be quiet.
I know this is way to depressing. But it has a purpose. To reach people or women in particular that have faced challenges and think that they are alone. This blog is to connect the possibly lost!!
It isn’t all dark. I went to Oceanside beach in California and it was theraputic. Love the ocean!!